You may have experienced betrayal trauma if someone you depended on has violated your trust or well-being, either once or over time. That betrayal might cause you to dissociate, or “disconnect,” from your emotions and feel fear and shame. There are several ways to treat betrayal trauma, although it’s not a medical diagnosis. A mental health professional might help you create empathy for yourself and reconnect with your body’s inner sensations.
Betrayal trauma might create negative beliefs about your safety and trust. As a result, you might feel like you cannot depend on others. Read on to learn about betrayal trauma, what it is, and how you might recover from it.
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What Is Betrayal Trauma?
Betrayal trauma stems from mistreatment by a caregiver or a trusted person, such as an intimate partner. That mistreatment might include emotional abuse, physical violence, or sexual abuse.
You may try to avoid the negative feelings that result from abuse if you have experienced betrayal trauma. Some evidence suggests that people use avoidance to adapt and survive abusive situations. Still, not everyone who experiences betrayal trauma reacts the same way.
“How people respond [to betrayal trauma] depends on the person and details of the experience,” Jennifer Joy Freyd, PhD, founder and president of the Center for Institutional Courage, Inc., toldHealth. Freyd was one of the first people to introduce the concept of betrayal trauma.
Research has found that some of the most common reactions to betrayal trauma include anxiety, depression, and dissociation. Dissociation feels like being “disconnected” from your emotions and thoughts as a way to deal with stress.
What Is Generational Trauma? Symptoms of Betrayal Trauma
You might develop adverse beliefs about your safety and trust if you have experienced betrayal trauma. That lack of security typically results in negative perceptions of others, especially trusted people and institutions. For example, research has found that people with betrayal trauma are likely to distrust healthcare providers.
Other betrayal trauma signs and symptoms might include:
Complaints about physical health An inability to depend on othersAn increased risk of mental health conditions (e.g., anxiety and depression)More sick days from school or workNegative beliefs about yourself Betrayal Trauma vs. PTSD
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a psychiatric disorder in people who have experienced trauma, resulting in fear.Traumatic events might include combat, natural disasters, and sexual violence, such as rape. In contrast, betrayal trauma often results in dissociation and shame. Both betrayal trauma and PTSD involve problems caused by trying to avoid negative feelings.
“Although PTSD does impact a lot of survivors, its diagnosis and treatment do not take into account the particular ways that being abused by someone trusted or depended upon impacts a survivor,”Melissa Platt, PhD, a clinical psychologist based in Oregon, toldHealth. “These different trauma consequences necessitate quite different treatment approaches.”
Platt worked with war veterans returning from Iraq and Afghanistan in the mid-2000s. In one of her studies, the veterans often answered "no" to many PTSD assessment questions despite seeming deeply pained, said Platt.
"It seemed like the PTSD interview was not always asking the right questions in situations in which the trauma was perpetrated by a commander, fellow unit members, or anyone else the veteran trusted or depended on for survival," noted Platt. "Since then, my career has focused on understanding and treating betrayal trauma."
Types of Betrayal Trauma
People typically have many relationships, such as with their cultures, families, governments, and healthcare providers. As a result, there are several ways in which betrayal trauma might occur. Research has identified different types of betrayal trauma, depending on the relationship.
Cultural Betrayal
Betrayal can happen within cultural groups, specifically minority groups. In a minority group, there is a high level of trust between the group members. Being a part of a group offers protection, or a sense of safety, against social inequality. Cultural betrayal trauma might cause dissociation, hallucinations, and internalized prejudice.
Familial Betrayal
Familial betrayal involves a breach of trust between people in an intimate relationship. Betrayal within a family includes childhood abuse from a caregiver, infidelity, and intimate partner violence (IPV). Research has linked familial betrayal during childhood to dissociation and PTSD later in life.
Institutional Betrayal
Betrayal trauma can happen when an institution harms the people it claims to serve. That can include governments, hospitals, mental health facilities, and police departments. For example, a therapist betrays a client's trust if they blame them for the abuse they experienced. That betrayal may worsen the effects of that abuse.
Betrayal Trauma Therapy and Recovery
Betrayal trauma is a way to understand the type of harm a person experiences rather than a diagnosis. There's no single treatment approach. Instead, several elements are necessary for deep healing to be possible, said Platt.
Interoception
You might dissociate from your body if you have experienced betrayal trauma. Developing the skill of interoception helps alleviate those dissociative feelings. Interoception involves identifying and understanding bodily sensations.
"Many somatic approaches, such as somatic experiencing and sensorimotor psychotherapy, help survivors develop interoceptive skills," said Platt.
Somatic experiencing and sensorimotor psychotherapy help bring your attention to how your body holds onto emotions. You might talk about your experiences with a mental healthcare provider while recognizing how your body reacts.
Abuse might cause unprocessed emotions to build up in your body. As a result, you might notice physical symptoms like disrupted sleep, stress, and tension. It can be scary at first to tune in and listen to your body. Still, you might learn that your body’s messages are more trustworthy than you thought.
Psychoeducation
Psychoeducation can help you understand betrayal trauma, how it manifests, and ways to treat it. For example, a mental healthcare provider might educate you that dissociating and feeling shame are actually survival mechanisms that you use to avoid making waves with the perpetrator.
"[People with betrayal trauma] often believe they are 'bad' because they feel bad and because shame is a normal survival response to experiencing betrayal trauma, but they are not usually aware that is the case," said Platt. "Survivors need to understand that these symptoms are signs that their mind was trying to help them to survive, rather than signs that there is anything wrong with them."
Self-Compassion
You might be highly critical of yourself or feel shame if you have experienced betrayal trauma. Compassion-focused therapy can help you create empathy for yourself, which helps build trust and improve your mood.
"Survivors also need to learn to treat themselves with kindness and compassion in order to be able to stay the course and heal," said Platt.
How To Identify and Break a Trauma Bond When To Contact a Mental Health Professional
Research has found that a lack of safety and trust makes some people with betrayal trauma unwilling to confide in healthcare providers. Still, it's essential to seek treatment if you have experienced betrayal trauma. A mental health professional can help you process and manage negative feelings, improving your mood and quality of life.
Here are some signs and symptoms that you might need to talk to a healthcare provider about your mental health:
Being unable to stop thinking about specific memories or thoughtsBelieving things that are not real (i.e., hearing voices in your head)Body aches and pains that do not have an apparent causeFeeling helpless or hopelessA lack of interest in hobbies you typically enjoyLow or no energyNegative feelings (e.g., angry, sad, scared, or worried) that impact your daily activities and relationshipsPoor eating or sleeping habitsThoughts of self-harmUsing alcohol or drugs more than usual Looking for support?
If you are in crisis, or know someone who is, reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988 or go to SpeakingOfSuicide.com/resources for a list of additional resources.
If this is an emergency, call 911.
911 A Quick Review
Betrayal trauma might occur after a one-time incident or involve abuse that occurs over time. You might develop negative thoughts about your safety and trust and feel unable to depend on others.
Contact a mental health professional if you often feel helpless or hopeless or develop a lack of interest in things you used to enjoy. Recovering from betrayal trauma may take time, but treatment options are available. Treatment is about healing rather than fixing or getting rid of symptoms, said Platt.